Strange conversation with mum

I had this strange conversation with my mum last night. 😳 #Creativity⁣

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Sexism, ableism, rage, feminised labour..⁣

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You know that Asian mum thing where you’re getting a compliment but it sounds aggressive & like you’re being told off. 😝⁣

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SquidMum: YOU’RE SO CREATIVE. I’M NOT CREATIVE. I JUST FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS. YOUR DAD WASN’T CREATIVE. I DON’T KNOW WHERE YOU GET IT FROM.⁣

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Squid: Dad made meals using leftovers & built sections of house. You need to be inventive to do that. Creativity is just problem solving. ⁣

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SquidMum: I was so bad at maths at school. ⁣My brothers were just naturally good at it. Uncle Y was brilliant. That’s why they decided I wouldn’t go to secondary school. ⁣

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Me: Why didn’t someone help you? ⁣

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SquidMum: No one helped me.⁣

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Me: But both your parents were teachers!! What about your brothers?! If they were so brilliant at maths, why didn’t they help you? ⁣

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SquidMum: Well Uncle Y wasn’t even born yet. Uncle X was 13 - the age of just teasing me. He wouldn’t help me. ⁣

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Me: What about a tutor? ⁣

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SquidMum: How could we afford a tutor? ⁣

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Me: ***Fuming about the patriarchy and how if she had an older sister it’s likely she’d have been drafted to help my mum with her maths.***⁣

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My mum used/uses maths to do her accounts, cooking, knitting, sewing, ordering stuff for the house 🧶🥣🪑🏚. ⁣

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Instead of going to secondary school, my mum learnt #piano & taught piano from age 15, earning for her family - way earlier than her brothers!!! As a young teen, she studied English Lit at an evening class for adults. She enjoyed these subjects & a kind of status due to her piano specialism but I feel she missed out on peer socialisation & general subjects.⁣

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She’s been Convenor for, organised & run public #music events serving maybe thousands of people over 20 years but most of her work is hidden & she doesn’t feel confident with English. I wonder if she might be neurodivergent too.⁣

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I struggle to be & create here bc this is a place where I spent holding decades of ***other people’s*** anger. I finally feel I deserve to be comfortable too. 🤔🏡😯Meanwhile processing & sharing. 📝📝

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LGBTIQ, storytelling, trans, film, photographyThe Mollusc Dimension